When I went for my last routine mammogram, I was quickly whisked away to another room for an ultrasound. They had seen an enlarged lymph node and the doctor asked me if I had a cat, thinking that I might have “cat scratch fever” which could cause an inflammation of my lymph nodes. We have a ragdoll named Buttons, that I ‘roughhouse’ with and I do get scratched and bitten So, he said to come back in a few months to see if the lymph node had changed.
In early June, I went in for another ultrasound, and the enlarged node was still there, so I was scheduled for a biopsy, during which the doctor took 4 samples from the lymph node. I waited for a week to get the verdict and it was a little slow in coming back so I called my gynocologist’s office hoping that they had received the results - still nothing . . . .
June 30, 2010 was my last day of school for the year and I was going to meet Blair at Main Place for pedicures {one of the girl things that we enjoy doing together}. She was going to meet me in Coldwater Creek and we would go from there. As Blair walked in the door at CC, my cell phone rang and it was Debbie Tobin, the PA from the gynocologist’s office. She said that she had the results and I sort of flipantly asked if it would be better if I were sitting down. She said ‘yes probably’, and apologized that she had to deliver the news, but because she knew me, she felt that she should make the call. I heard ‘lymphoma, leukemia, and bone marrow test’, and thanked her for calling. I decided to go ahead with the nail appt. {it was necessary, after all!} and walked out in the mall to sit on a bench and call Terry who was on his way to an Angels’ game. I suggested that he go to to the game, then we’d talk later at home. Talking to him brought on the tears and I cried through the entire appointment! Blair and I usually have a lively conversation while we’re getting our nails done, but I was crying and she was googling “lymphoma” on her phone. Then Terry walked into the salon. (What a guy!)
It’s interesting, that looking back I can see steps leading up to receiving this news. On the way to breakfast last Sunday, I was listening to a bible study where the pastor was saying that many think that when we become Christians, we think that our life will be safe and without problems, when, in reality, it’s often just the opposite! He was saying to the congregation that God refines us with ”_____”, waiting for them to respond with ‘FIRE’. I said it audibly before they got it out of their mouths! We find ourselves in situations where we are tried and tested to increase our faith in God, causing us to grow.
Well, there you have it, folks! I do not believe that God caused this lymphoma, but I do believe that He has a plan for my life and HE will use it for His glory!
A friend from church sent me the most encouraging note and included some scripture verses that she thought I might find helpful. I have decided to use one of them as a constant reminder of whose I am and where I am.
Psalms 91:4 NIV He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.
